Recovering from the Blip

Nearly six months have passed since Annika's "blip."  I've decided that Blip feels like the right description for her cardiac arrest, as the whole situation rather resembles the Blip from the Marvel-verse.  Back in December, it felt as if the world had ended when she slipped away from us as quickly as if Thanos had snapped his fingers.   Her sudden return to vitality seems just as miraculous, although the power of prayer trumps any infinity stone.  Now the world is eerily back to normal.  At the moment, Annika is playing in the mud at Hummel Day Camp, just like a year ago.  Looking from the outside, life continues as it did before, yet beneath the surface all is changed, mostly because we are changed.  

The Blip left a few visible remnants in the form of scars, medications, and copious doctor appointments.  More significant is the invisible trauma--flashbacks from her collapse, the triggering sound of a helicopter, and concern for the future.  All in all though, we are healing.  For nearly six months, Annika's heart has beat strong all on its own.  A beating heart--have you ever stopped to think about what a miracle that is?  Yours, mine, hers--it's remarkable!  As Annika's heart beats steady, I am learning to take all that anxiety and worry and turn it into Hope and Gratitude.  Hope that this Blip may be a one-time occurrence and Gratitude for the time we have together.

I still have no words to adequately express our thanks to the hundreds, perhaps thousands, who prayed for our daughter.  We feel the power of your faith and love!  Thanks to all who gave so generously to Annie's Fight Club Fund.  Your generosity brings me to tears every time I think of it.  Finally, thanks to all the skilled doctors and nurses who worked around the clock to save our child.  While Annika colored this picture for everyone, she brought the actual drawing to the ER at Salt Lake Regional to give to those who resuscitated her.

  

You know, Annika and I share an unusual connection.  She and I were both saved by CPR and our fathers.  When I was two years old, I fell into a pond on my Uncle Dean's property in Oklahoma.  By the time the adults reached the scene, I was floating face down in the water.  They estimate that I was underwater for nearly five minutes.  After fishing me out of the pond, my father and uncle performed CPR and brought me back to life.  By the time the ambulance arrived, I was not only breathing, but chatty.  While Jason may not have personally resuscitated Annika, he likewise saved her by getting her the high quality CPR she so desperately needed.  So in the wake of Father's Day, I would like to thank the two most important men in my life not only for their incredible examples, but for literally saving lives.

Wow, this blogpost is heavy--sorry about that.  I just have a lot weighing on my heart and I need to spill the tea.  But really, the thing that makes my heart overflow is gratitude!  I am SO thankful for the community that has supported us so much over the past six months.  Whether friends, neighbors, or even strangers who encountered our story online, we will always be grateful for your love and support.

To remember this tenderness, I'd like to skip back to January where Annika's recovery was marked by a parade of friends and family stopping by to share their love.  This is Annika with her Girl Scout leader Kelsey and her daughter Mae.  The poster contains special notes from all her Girl Scout sisters.  Just looking at it makes me want to cry!

A fellow animal whisperer, Mae really loved Spark.

Here's Annika with another couple Girl Scout sisters, Lily and Violet.  In this case, Lily and Violet actually are sisters (twins), who brought the tiger scarf and hat back from their visit to New York.  Perfect for our feline aficionado!

These special hospital bears came from our friend Anne Vinsel.

Of course, since Christmas came late to the Wheeler household, Annika had some work to do.  A paleontologist in the making, she needed to search the dinosaur egg for treasure.

Naturally she needed to eat the candy off her gingerbread house as well.

This much excitement can leave a gal exhausted!  Good thing Sam and Zizheng gave her a polar bear stuffie to sleep on.

  

What's this?  Another visit from another friend!  Our neighbor Nina shared her beautiful horse stable with Annie.  Annika loves it!  Heck, after days in her plaid jammies, she finally changed into real clothes to play with it.

The beautiful quilt came from our friend Cynthia Gandy.  When convalescing, one can never have too many blankets.

Hugs from our neighbors, the Nielsens.

And here's our sweet neighbor Rebecca Giles, who gave Annika a Princess Kitty to snuggle at night.  Thanks to all!

Of course, coming out of the hospital there was plenty of other work to do as well.   In the first week home, we had consults with physical therapy, occupational therapy, feeding therapy, neurology, and cardiology.  The appointments alone felt like a full-time job!  Fortunately, Annika's recovery moved swiftly enough that we didn't need most of the therapy for long.  In fact, our only ongoing therapy has been behavioral therapy.  It's been really helpful for Annika to have a place where she can talk about all that has happened in her life and learn strategies to help her move forward.

This gal is now an echocardiogram expert.

Her favorite part of appointments is the sushi afterwards.

For those who are not squeamish, here's a look at some of the physical trauma.  Here you can see the incision from Annika's ICD.  She wasn't allowed to raise her arm above shoulder level for eight weeks as it healed, mostly because the lead might get dislodged internally.

The stress of the hospital stay resulted in two bald spots on the back of her head that are fortunately growing back now.  Apparently hair loss is pretty common after ECMO or critical illness.

Particularly gnarly was the giant scar from where the ECMO cannulas were inserted into her femoral vein and artery.  It didn't look too bad all stapled up...

But once the staples were removed it turned into this.  Yeah, that ended in an extra trip to the surgeon, coupled with a visit to the dermatologist.  In case you were wondering, the surgeon said it looked fine.  I guess I don't wanna know what bad looks like!

Next order of business--eat food! Our thin little gal got even skinnier during her hospital stay, so we were glad that she wanted to tuck into avocado and egg sandwiches.

As for hydration, only thickened liquids per doctor's orders.  In case you're wondering what she thought of that...

Worst. Thing. EVER!  We could not get her to drink the thickened goo, no matter how hard we tried.  

Eventually we succumbed and allowed her to substitute smoothies, even though they technically qualify as a hidden liquid.  She and I bonded through our mutual love for a Pumpkin Smash Jamba Juice.  This picture also shows Annika's quirky crooked smile.  While Annie's always had a bit of a lopsided grin in posed pictures, her hospital stay definitely exaggerated it.  Since the MRI of her brain looks great and she's not showing any other neurological deficits, we're not particularly concerned.  It's just cute!

Our friend Brooke Kubinski must have gotten the memo about feeding Annika well, because she brought us over a BIG meal.  Gotta keep those hungry teens fed!

You've never seen a loaf of bread like this.  It weighed as much as a baby!

Mighty meatballs for our mighty girl.  (The rest of the family loved them too.  There sure was plenty to go around!)

Adding to the gluttony with donuts and rice pudding.  I can see the love!

Other fun moments.  Annika got to play with our friend Ezra's lizard.  So cute!

An extra special surprise came from the Wells family as well.  We listened to Toothless's special message over and over!

Annika's teacher Mr. Mitchell came to visit and brought beautiful cards that the class made.  Annie felt so loved!

Even better were the visits from family and friends.  Here's Annie playing with her friend Jack.

Painting nails with Hannah.

Aunt Callie taught our sweet girl how to play Cat's Cradle.

And let's not forget our favorite baby Violet!

For me, my favorite moments during Annika's recovery were the quiet ones.  Like a snuggle with Dad...

...or telling stories at suppertime.  All is well with the world in moments like these.

Annika was even back to her typical crafting.  And no, these are not tears.  She's donning duct tape dragon scales.

How about a dog, cat, snowman, fish, and narwhal, all made out of wet wipes and toothpicks.

Remember those thickened liquids that Annika wouldn't drink?  Well, on January 19th we discovered the consequences of ingesting far too little fluid.  Severe back pain incited a midnight jaunt to the emergency room.  If we've learned anything, it's to take Annie seriously when she says something hurts.  

When the nurse lightly touched on Annika's stomach, Annie proceeded to vomit all over.  Fortunately the nurse had quick reflexes and dodged out of the way.  An abdominal x-ray revealed the culprit.  Poop.  And lots of it.  Eager to draw upon Uncle Justin's expertise, we identified some major constipation.  Below we have an x-ray from December compared with January's x-ray that is filled with lots more splotchy gunk.  It's also interesting because you can see the PICC lines and ECMO cannulas in the first.  In the second you can see the lead from her ICD.  

Anyway, back to the ER, around 4am we were finally sent home with a container of Mira-lax and instructions to hydrate more.  Crisis averted.

Annika stayed home for the month of January as she healed.  We were pretty nervous about how her heart would respond if she caught a nasty virus, so it seemed wise to limit her exposure for a while.  Our adventures in homeschooling were...mediocre.  Eureka Math isn't much fun at school, but even less fun with mom.

I thought I taught an EXCELLENT lesson on fractions, but Annika was less impressed.

Stir crazy from being at home, we finally added some field trips to our curriculum.  The planetarium on a weekday is a great place to both learn and avoid crowds.

Does IKEA count as educational?  We did visit the blue whales.

The Farm at Thanksgiving Point was probably a bit more legit.

Annika and I visited the Natural History Museum there for the first time as well.  Enormously impressive!

Occasionally Annika got to accompany Jason at work while I was at nursing school.  As you might imagine, she LOVED visiting the homes with puppies.

You know what's even better than a puppy?

A guinea pig, especially ours.  We love you Spark!

And we love you Annie.  Thanks for sticking with our family! These four bright smiles light my life and make the world spin right!

And one last time, our gratitude to all for the love and prayers.  To quote our Annika, "I think God saved me for a reason."  She's a million dollar miracle (actually more, according to the medical bills) and worth every penny.