Monday, June 02, 2008

Death of a Donkey

This is an Ode to Eeyore. Those of you who know me well well-know that for years I have shared my bed with a loyal, faithful, and fluffy companion, Eeyore. Eeyore has been my trusty bedfellow, lending me an ear, hoof, or even rump whenever extra support and comfort was needed. In 2003, he graciously accommodated another man by making room in the bed for Jason, sacrificing his limbs as padding for my spouse’s bony shoulders. He willingly accompanied me from coast to coast by car, van, and plane so that I might snooze sweetly, and even joined me in the hospital during the delivery of both my daughters.

Regrettably, Eeyore slipped away on the eve of May 28, 2008 to the landfill from whence no donkey returns. He heroically sacrificed his life by tumbling out of the mini-van to comfort Jason during Jason’s time of need. Unfortunately, he landed in the puddle of recycled McDonald’s salad that Jason had recently deposited on the side of I-80, thanks to a truly miserable bout of the stomach flu. Covered in vomit, Eeyore rapidly achieved “undesirable” status and was buried in a dumpster. (Fortunately the girls avoided a similar fate, despite their own battles with the stomach flu.) Eeyore was preceded in death by a quarter pounder and French fries.


Tiffany said...

I'm sorry to hear about the passing of Eeyore, hopefully you can find a new friend soon. I also hope you guys are over the stomach flu and are feeling better.

Michael said...

Poor, poor Eeyore.

Poor, poor cheeseburger and fries.

May they all Rest In Peace and, hopefully, remain "Favored" in our memories.

Kay said...

"I have a question for you ... if its not too much trouble?" Why did you discard your dour friend in his hour of need? Abandoning an old friend in such an undignified state merely makes me want to hurl myself. It seems that the only loveable jackass on earth was "thrown-up" and "hurled" into a dumpster just because he needed a good bath. The good news is ... Eeyore is very forgiving and has an inferiority complex to match his ears. He was the most admirable non-human character in all of English language literature. And now he is reduced to rotten, smelly fibers in an obscure landfill somewhere in the midlands. I bet he is responsible for the rotten tomato problem we are experiencing around the country.

Smile anyway.

runnermonkey said...

Oh! Sad day! Poor Eeyore. :( Are you going to get an Eeyore Jr.?